Search Quotes
#12588
99
⚐ Report// Talking about home renovations Glenn: I walk in and I see all of my carpet torn up. Glenn: And my best friend says "Who skinned Kermit on the floor?" because that was the color of the carpet.
#12587
1111
⚐ ReportGlenn: I got a text saying "where is the crowbar?" Glenn: Then I got another text saying "where is the duct tape?" Glenn: I'm just glad I didn't get a text saying "do you have an industrial-sized trash bag?"
#12585
1313
⚐ ReportShriyan: "I got a manual." Smolen (confused): "...You bought a person named Emmanuel?" //After clarifications that they were talking about cars, Smolen diverges into a story about his brother driving a car at 3 years old. Summary: She was poking around her dad's workshop, saw the car pulling out of the driveway, and panicked. The car ended up crashing into a power generator (?) and her parents got angry at her. Smolen: "...and he was laughing the whole time!" Andy: "Me for real."
#12584
1115
⚐ Report//slowly splits apart a plum, a manic grin spreading across his face ZIyad (holding the two separate halves): It's the derivative... Eric Shi: What are you on??? Ziyad: No, no, it's related rates! If you take the fruit out and put juice in, the rate of the ball is changing and you can find the volume using... (gasps) dV/dt!!!!! :O
#12580
1717
⚐ ReportSahu: let's talk about the govern- ima stop myself there. Sahu: let's say i publish a book that says grapes cause blindness Sahu: only white.. i mean green grapes cause blindness. purple grapes prevent blindness Sahu: i can say it's true, i'm a doctor. Sahu M.D. Sahu: little do they know, i own a purple grape farm, and my competitive neighbor owns a green grape farm Yongle: he's a part of big grape!