#10586

99

May 18, 2022, 3:17 p.m.

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Duval: What did you learn from this video? //class silent Duval: You learned nothing? You already knew everything in this video? Duval: I don't believe you, but cool. Duval: There are no normal people anyway. Duval: Is anyone here normal? //class silent Will: I'm normal! Duval: Just don't treat them differently from how you would other people. Duval: If you're a jerk to everyone, be a jerk to everyone? Duval: Is it okay to make a mistake? Katz: No. Duval: I'm sure you'd never make a mistake. Duval: I'm a Bio teacher. I can say "penis".

#691

44

Oct. 14, 2009, 7:50 p.m.

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//talking about burials of leaders Whitacre: $10,000 to put a guy in a hollow stick and bury it! Just use a baggy! You use zip lock, you're like, "I just saved $9,996, I'm going somewhere!"

#11673

1111

March 13, 2023, 2:25 p.m.

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Mr. Rose: Those shakespearean sonnets, they just talk about love or whatever. That crap doesn’t even exist. We’re taking about math here!

#1074

99

Dec. 7, 2009, 4:28 p.m.

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//Dr. Simel's phone rings Simel (answers): Hey, I'm in class, but I have a quick question: Is bringing shot glasses to Hanukkah too inappropriate? //listens for a bit Simel: What! So the drinking theme is out for this year?

#4275

-37

Oct. 25, 2012, 7:35 a.m.

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//Simeon is playing a football game on his iPod. //Clare then takes the iPod from Simeon in the middle of the game. Simeon: Hey! You're going to make me lose. Clare: But I scored, see, it says touchdown. Simeon: The other team scored...

#8855

4646

Dec. 22, 2020, 3:57 p.m.

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//logic Rose: suppose someone walks into the room and asks, "what's three?" and you go, "oh, shit."

#2353

1111

Oct. 13, 2010, 2:42 p.m.

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//A student walks in to Ms. Smrek's psychology class Student: Hey Ms. Smrek. Smrek: ...did you come in here just to say that? Student: Yup. Smrek: ...go back to class. Student: But I have Mr. Whitacre!! Smrek: HA! Too bad, go back to his class. Student (while walking out): You know, we were talking about how you and Mr. Whitacre should get married. You could have angry babies!

#2446

1515

Oct. 29, 2010, 2:54 p.m.

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//John Anderson is in Piper's room, trying to study for a test. Mr. Pham walks in. Pham: Nice shirt. //John looks at his shirt. It has 'CCCP' and has the hammer and sickle John: Thanks, Mr. Pham... Pham: Can you get me one, extra large?

#2122

2121

Sept. 16, 2010, 9:24 p.m.

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Stein: So you can't go faster than the speed of light? Schafer: Not without dilithium crystals and a warp core.

#9713

1717

Jan. 6, 2022, 12:52 p.m.

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Gibb, looking over Ace's shoulder as they play protobowl: this is the most random stuff I have ever seen. Gibb: I love it.