#1292

-24

Jan. 11, 2010, 10:59 a.m.

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Hinkle: Ladies and gentlemen, remember how a few classes ago I said that paper products is the name of the game here at Montgomery Blair? Hinkle: [talks about paper towels]

#1494

13

Feb. 14, 2010, 9:28 p.m.

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Reckson: ...and "crash" is not a word.

#3773

1515

Nov. 10, 2011, 10:29 p.m.

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Giles: My goal in life is to make Raanan suffer

#1105

1212

Dec. 8, 2009, 8:34 p.m.

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Wylie: The issue with Mr. Pham is he doesn't do a good Pham accent.

#5432

1315

March 25, 2015, 7:16 p.m.

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//Excerpted and paraphrased due to memory lapses //Mr. Hammond walks into Quantum Schafer: I bet Mr. Hammond is coming in to force whomever hasn't signed up yet for PuzzlePalooza to sign up. Hammond: I am actually not going to do that. Schafer: Oh, well then, I'm sorry. Hammond: My feelings are hurt, Mr. Schafer. (continuing with class) Schafer: The atom is from the Greek "atomos"... Hammond: You got that from Donaldson. Schafer: No, I actually didn't. Hammond: Anything Greek is from Donaldson. Melinchok: I'm Greek! Hammond: Did you sign up for PuzzlePalooza yet? Melinchok: No, I didn't. I need to send the link to my friend. Hammond: You should just sign up without her. Melinchok: Ok, I'm signing up now. (fills in form on her phone) I'll put down my talents as "Greek" and (something else). Student: Isn't there a choice for "Other?" Hammond: There is. Mr. Schafer, did I tell you about the best Other I've seen so far? Schafer: No, what was it? Hammond: It was "the ability to lie and say that Justin Bieber is cool." (class laughs) Hammond: Hey, it isn't my fault that Mr. Ostrander has a man crush on Justin Bieber! ... Hammond: The first rule of Puzzle Lords is that there are no Puzzle Lords. Schafer: That is just wrong in so many ways. ... Hammond: (to Melinchok) do you follow the Puzzle Lords on Twitter? Melinchok: I unfollowed them because they kept on making annoying posts. Schafer: Did you just say you UNfollowed them? Is that even like a thing? That's like saying you unfriended someone, it just doesn't make sense. Hammond: And all of the annoying posts are by Mr. Stein! Melinchok: Oh, I unfollowed him too. (class laughs) Melinchok: Ok..I'll follow the Puzzle Lords, but... (brief pause) Schafer: You'd better be really careful with what you say next. Melinchok: But whenever I see an annoying post, I'll...scroll right past it and pretend that I never saw it! Hammond: ...Someone must be submitting this to Blairbash right now. ... Melinchok: What does it mean, the prizes are huge? Like are they literally huge, or what? Schafer: Well, there are many ways a prize could be huge. Like it could be really big, and you say, "Wow, that's huge." Or it could be about this big (holds his hands about 8 inches apart) but you look at it and you go, "Wow, that's a huge prize." Or its name could be huge, like Huge the Hamster. We haven't done that one yet though.

#10

99

May 21, 2009, 8:14 p.m.

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Mr Rose: Well; I did just like you said. This morning I woke up at 5am, feeling not too great. I squeezed a whole lemon's worth of lemon juice (by hand) into a glass....added a bunch of honey...and ever since I feel like I'm gonna barf / explode out of all other orifices.

#4018

1818

March 5, 2012, 4:41 p.m.

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Michelle: Hey Mr. Pham, he said you sound like an owl. Pham (with emphasis): WHO? //Class laughs

#6728

59

Oct. 6, 2017, 5:52 p.m.

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Steven: Who knows? I personally know nothing about Wieners!

#9153

1214

May 25, 2021, 9:10 a.m.

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//Ento Duval: Thomas (the tank engine) is just teaching Communism to children.

#3409

59

May 24, 2011, 3:50 p.m.

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//John is talking on the phone to Michael John: Thank you very much, I do have balls and I do have brains.