#1069

11

Dec. 7, 2009, 1:09 p.m.

⚐ Report

Whitacre: Provisional driver's license? Are you a provisional organ donor, too?

#1068

22

Dec. 7, 2009, 1:05 p.m.

⚐ Report

Steven: Betty Crocker is non-existent. Whitacre: So is your skill in baking cakes. Steven: No, I can make a beastly ramen! Whitacre: Because ramen's the start of everything.

#1059

1212

Dec. 5, 2009, 11:24 a.m.

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//After someone claims to have studied, but failed Whitacre: See, that's like my uncle! He's like "I done studies good!" "Good, unc!" See why I wanted to stay away from that side of the family? Y'know, rednecks from Ohio... //Somehow, the conversation turns to drinking 2 gallons of Iced Tea Student: I don't drink that much! Whitacre: See, it's like my uncle again! "I don't drink too much!" Then you see him with a jug that's got a handle, full of moonshine, holds it up to his ear and it's like "I'm ready to pour! Git up on the tractor, I give you a ride!" Oh, God, see why I never trusted him?

#1058

33

Dec. 5, 2009, 11:18 a.m.

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//Talking about how we react to crises Whitacre: See, we try to act diplomatic. You see those guys on TV with hostages and we're all like "Would you please stop? We don't approve of that action." But what we're all really thinking is "I'm gonna kick the crap outta them!"

#1057

13

Dec. 5, 2009, 11:16 a.m.

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//Someone made a stupid comment Whitacre: Who said that? I'm gonna beat 'em up!

#1056

33

Dec. 5, 2009, 11:15 a.m.

⚐ Report

//People come in for the canned food drive Whitacre: What do you want? People: Canned food? Whitacre: Why would I have canned food? //They START advertising to the class People: So you should do this because there are people dying who need food. //When they leave Whitacre: Those were the worst salespeople...ever.

#1055

810

Dec. 4, 2009, 8:40 p.m.

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// Jon gets up to get tissues at least once every class Whitacre: You're always sick! Jon: It's usually just the mornings... Brian G: He has morning sickness.

#1053

2020

Dec. 4, 2009, 8:35 p.m.

⚐ Report

Mario: How many ties of Darwin do you have? Whitacre: Not enough. Do you want to give me some? Student: For Christmas? Whitacre: I don't celebrate Christmas. Student: What, do you celebrate Hanukkah? Whitacre: No, I celebrate pay days. They come more often.

#1027

4044

Dec. 3, 2009, 2:48 p.m.

⚐ Report

//Kamal is reading Swokowski instead of listening to Mr. Whitacre //Whitacre walks up behind Kamal and steals his textbook Whitacre: Do you need this? //Whitacre walks to the window, opens it up, and holds the book out the window Kamal: I'd rather see you drop it out the window. //after about a minute of back-and-forth Whitacre: What book is this, anyways? Kamal: It's a math book. Ben: Multivariable calculus! Whitacre: Yeah, it's gotta go. //Whitacre drops the book out the window //everyone runs to the window to see //meanwhile, Kamal runs outside to retrieve his textbook Steven: Next goes the stool! //Steven starts putting the stool out the window, but Whitacre closes the window //Kamal gets his textbook, but he's locked out of the building //Whitacre asks another student to let Kamal in Whitacre (opening back up the window): We're sending rescue! (to the class) He can do math, but he can't get back into the building. Kamal (upon returning): That was roughly the coolest thing ever!

#1026

33

Dec. 3, 2009, 2:45 p.m.

⚐ Report

Whitacre: It's the woman's fault. We can stop there. The course is over. Thank you. //starts walking towards the door