#6845

1717

Oct. 25, 2017, 5:47 p.m.

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Steven: So if you know calculus, this is easy. //Writes stuff on board Steven: Oh shoot is Schwartz here? Freshmen, you saw nothing.

#6814

77

Oct. 20, 2017, 6:38 p.m.

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//Schwartz is using his fingers to explain proofs //He ends up making rude guestures Schwartz: Is this mathematically valid? Students (giggling): Yes. Schwartz: Then back off! It's MATH, not you-know-what!

#6808

88

Oct. 19, 2017, 3:07 p.m.

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//T O O  M U C H   M A T H   L A T E R and a fraction that spans the entire whiteboard Schwartz: So this determines whether or not the matrix is invertible Schwartz: Let's call it... Anson: The determinator! Schwartz: Okay! *few statements later* So now we have defined what a determinant is Anson: No we defined a determinator.

#6768

111115

Oct. 14, 2017, 9:59 a.m.

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//Abigail walking around with no shoes Schwartz: It's common for math majors to walk without shoes. Reynald: It's because they can't afford them.

#6764

216

Oct. 12, 2017, 7:31 p.m.

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Schwartz: Whoever keeps writing "I do not like The Princess Bride" on the board, stop! It is hurtful! Sam: You're a terrible person! The Princess Bride is a good movie!!! Schwartz: *facepalm*

#6762

1826

Oct. 12, 2017, 5:20 p.m.

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//Tad says something stupid //Schwartz tells him to stop //Chad laughs at Tad Schwartz: Hey! That's not cool! You can't laugh at someone because I said they were being dumb. Chad: WHat? No! I was laughing at him before! Schwartz: Oh, yeah, okay then. Laugh at him all you want.

#6683

1113

Sept. 29, 2017, 1:02 a.m.

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Schwartz: Nutrition! Everybody loves nutrition. There are three key nutrients to a balanced diet. Those are? Abigail: Sugar! Schwartz: Sugar! //writes sugar on the board, turns back to the class Various students: Caffiene! Schwartz: caffeine... //writes caffiene Other student: CYANIDE! Schwartz: Cyanide! Great! Schwartz: Now as nutritionists, we have foods we can recommend to our patients so they can get their recommended daily values of sugar, caffiene and cyanide. Those foods are? Other student: cereal! //schwartz writes cereal, turns around again Various students: Pizza! Cheesecake! Ice cream! Schwartz: Ice cream! Avik: Robitussin! //Schwartz looks around for a moment with questioning eyebrows Schwartz: Robitussin!

#6675

1717

Sept. 28, 2017, 6:05 p.m.

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//Student 1 gets caught looking up Schwartz during R&E Street: Close that thing before I call your mother. //he leaves Student 2: Teacher jealousy.

#6669

2020

Sept. 27, 2017, 7:55 p.m.

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Schwartz: Every 4 years there is an influx of people from hell to Washington DC.

#6664

11

Sept. 26, 2017, 9:29 p.m.

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//Making up a chemical equation to balance in Lin Alg Students: Hydrogen gas! Dichromate! Salt! Carbon monoxide! Schwartz: I will now write the chemical formulas on the other side. //Schwartz writes: NaCr3 + CrH5 + C24 + H2O + ClH2O Schwartz: That's chlorine water!