//Two masses and two springs problem
Schwartz: What shall be call the first mass?
Student 1: Mass 1!
Student 2: Bob!
Schwartz: (Points to Students) Ok, Your mom!
//students are laughing and confused
Student: How did you hear "your mom?"
Student 2: I said Bob
Student 1: I said mass 1
Schwartz: Oh, I probably combined those two and got "Your mom"
//We then named the other mass "Sid"
//So the rest of the springs and masses discussion contained quotes like:
Schwartz: What is the mass of your mom?
Schwartz: So we've got Sid attached to a spring attached to your mom attached to the wall with a spring!
Schwartz: In what direction is the force experienced by your mom?
Schwartz: When Sid is going in the positive direction, your mom wants to pull Sid back!
//And of course, after the discussion, when Schwartz is erasing:
Schwartz: We don't need your mom anymore!