Search Quotes
#8300
4848
⚐ Report//talk like a pirate day is also back to school night Student: Are you gonna talk like that to the parents, too? Schwartz: I be introducin' myself, then I be stoppin'
#8299
3737
⚐ Report// talking about low-quality free food Student: But it's free food! Schwartz: Aye, ye ready to go to college
#8256
3737
⚐ Report// Schwartz was talking about pirating Super Metroid Schwartz: You know people once tried to make anti-piracy ads, and they said stuff like "Would you want to pirate a car?" I mean what kind of question is that, of course I would want to pirate a car! If I could get a car for free why wouldn't I?
#8187
3131
⚐ Report//Last day for seniors, 3:26 PM Jonathan: I forgot my school password, so I can't log in to canvas. Schwartz: How!? It's only been 6 minutes!!
#8165
2325
⚐ Report//Complex //Guest lecture by UMD professor Tamas Darvas Darvas: I'm talking about the definition of smoothness you think about when you wake up in the morning. (draws examples) Schwartz, whispering: This is what I meant when I said "Complex is for students who wake up in the morning and think, today's a good day because I have math!"
#8150
1020
⚐ Report//Diff Eq 9th Schwartz: How can our solutions be real if our i's (eyes) aren't real?
#8119
101105
⚐ Report//Schwartz subbing in for Donaldson's Origins class Students around the room, imitating Aristotle: The sea is salty because the earth is sweating. People exhaling causes shooting stars. There are 53 spheres between the Earth and the Milky Way. People peeing and then having a tremor is analogous to the earth's waters flowing, followed by an earthquake. Schwartz: I'm beginning to understand why ancient philosophers were deemed heretics.
#8087
8688
⚐ Report//Complex //Haydn ties the window's pull cord to a stool, then places a pen on the string and lets go. The pen moves along the rope and hits the chair //Class looks at Haydn Schwartz: I have a story to tell about this. When I took AP Environmental Science-- do you guys still do that? The easiest way to pass the test is to pick the option closest to "Humans suck, and if we keep doing whatever we're doing, we're screwed". Environmental science is actually interesting, but the test was awful. Anyways, I finished in 45 minutes and had an hour left. It was also my last test, so I had all my AP student labels, and there were tissues, paper, pencils, and other instruments on a table we could go to. By using my student labels as adhesive, I constructed a sailboat during that hour, and whenever the proctor made their rounds, I would blow the sailboat from one end of the desk to the other.
#8060
3840
⚐ Report//ARML practice //Peter presenting a solution Peter: I got all the questions right except this one, so I don’t know why I’m doing this. Schwartz: Weird flex but okay.
#8052
3337
⚐ Report//Diff eq, just finished a Kahoot Schwartz: Wait, here's a prize for the person in second place. It's a packet of salt. Because they didn't get first.