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#2335

88

Oct. 9, 2010, 12:16 p.m.

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Stein: Who has coins in their pockets? I need about twenty coins. I'm poor. This is how I pay for my family's dinner.

#2334

66

Oct. 9, 2010, 11:40 a.m.

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Stein: Any other questions before I get to normal probability plots? // A truck blows its horn outside for a few seconds Stein: Somebody doesn't like normal probability plots.

#2333

2527

Oct. 8, 2010, 9:34 p.m.

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// Absorbed in a complicated math problem, Rose vigorously erases the board and accidentally knocks the clock off its hook. It dramatically crashes on the floor and splits into pieces. He stands there for a minute, observing the damage. Rose *mutters to himself*: F***. Stein: You broke my clock. That's the second clock you've broken. Rose: *pause* Actually, a student broke the first clock. // students gather around Rose: You know, I'm 32 years old and I'm finally accepting that I'm a klutz.

#2290

11

Oct. 5, 2010, 4:17 p.m.

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//about the difference between correlation and association Stein: That sounds really good. I'm not sure that it's right, but I like how it sounds.

#2289

57

Oct. 5, 2010, 4:17 p.m.

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Stein: Watch this. Just watch this chicken right here. Kendix: Does it lay eggs?

#2263

95101

Oct. 3, 2010, 10:40 p.m.

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Stein: Last week, I got mad about something and walked into Mr. Ostrander's office and said I quit, and he said 'puzzle palooza.'

#2262

44

Oct. 3, 2010, 10:38 p.m.

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Stein: I don't like being stared at and I'm not good at math, so of course I become a math teacher.

#2249

2424

Oct. 2, 2010, 11:48 p.m.

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Stein: I have a couple things to tell you about this Standard Normal Probability Table. The good news is, I am willing to copy, at the expense of Montgomery County Public Schools, one of these for you. It is [also] on the inside cover of your textbook, however it is a pain in the butt to flip back and forth when you're doing your homework. If you lose [the copy], it is easy to find it. Just google image search "Standard Normal Probability Table", and you too can print out one of these. It's not a secret. That's the good news. Stein: The bad news is I don't call it the "Standard Normal Probability Table", and what I'm about to tell you is probably the most annoying thing you'll hear from me the whole year, and you're going to hear it over and over again until you can't stand it, because I call this thing the "CH-A-R-A-R-A-RT" *shouts in crazy fluctuating/yodeling tone*, like that. // students laugh Stein: Now, there's no reason for that. I've been doing it for probably twelve years, since I started teaching statistics. You can't stop me. I know it's annoying and I continue to do it, so there's nothing you can do about it. And probably in about ten minutes you're going to be sick of hearing about the "CH-A-R-A-R-A-RT", but there's nothing you can do about it and just think how you're going to feel in January. After every time you got this piece of paper out, the stupid teacher goes "CH-A-R-A-R-A-RT" and nobody knows why. And what makes it even stupider is this is not even a chart. It's a table, so there's no reason behind why I call it the "CH-A-R-A-R-A-RT". Stein: Now first of all, there are two sides to it. Do you see the column that says "z"? One side has positive z and the other side has negative z. Now, you might think to yourself, being a smart person... Students: ...self... Stein: Thank you... it's symmetric, so you don't really need both sides, right? Students: Right. Stein: And in fact, I learned this when I was tutoring a kid who was doing IB. In Europe, they only give you one side. And you can do the problems just fine with only one side, but there's a reason why Europe is in decline and the United States is the greatest country on Earth. And one of the reasons why the United States is the greatest country on Earth and Europe is in decline is that we have both sides because we're Americans, and we don't need both sides but damn it, we get both sides!

#2248

44

Oct. 2, 2010, 10:48 p.m.

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// immediately after teaching the World-Famous Normal Curve Interpretive Dance Stein: That is The World-Famous... // Louis Wasserman spontaneously walks into the room (317) Stein: Do you remember? Wasserman: Oh, which is this? Stein: The World-Famous Normal Curve Interpretive Dance. Wasserman: Oh, heck yeah! Stein *to the class*: See, he graduated... Wasserman: ...three years ago. Stein: Three years ago, but it's still the highlight of his high school education. Wasserman: Absolutely!

#2247

13

Oct. 2, 2010, 10:02 p.m.

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// Ostrander spontaneously walks into 317 Ostrander: You have a projector and a Promethean Board. Stein: The TV? Ostrander: Yeah, you have like two projectors. Stein: It's a multimedia classroom. Ostrander: If we remove that one, would you be offended? *referring to the pre-Promethean era ceiling-mounted projector* Stein: That one? Yeah, I'll be offended! I need that... *referring to the Promethean projector* Ostrander: ...for... Stein: That's the Promethean... oh, THIS one! *points to the ceiling-mounted projector* // students laugh Stein: I thought you were talking about the Promethean Board and the television. Ostrander: No, no no. Stein: That was there before the Promethean Board. Ostrander: ... that device that no one uses. Stein: Yeah, that can go to 309. Ostrander: Uh... it'll probably go into an English room, but it will go somewhere without a Promethean Board. Stein: But what about 309? That needs it. Ostrander: I know. *students laugh* I don't have any teachers in 309.