// playing Habitat Hold 'Em (poker) in bio Student: Alright -- it looks like Brandon wins! //Brandon takes chips Sean et al: Let's go, Brandon! Sean et al: ... wait, no.
//Watching a video in bio Sophie Y: Woah! By 2100, there may be around 11.0 billion people! Noah: That's too many Sophies. I can't deal with that.
//setting up gel electrophoresis Delaney: You're gonna take some tape, and make a little wall. Delaney, quieter: And someone else is gonna pay for it.
Delaney: It's kinda like you're making a slab of jello. Unflavoured, cancerous jello.
Delaney: I've heard this Bio class is too easy. Katz: For some people. Delaney: For some people. Exactly. Delaney: There are some people -- I won't name any names, or point any fingers ... Delaney: *cough* Sean!
//lesson on biotechnology Delaney: I have a joke. Does anyone want to hear a joke? //several students raise hand Delaney: So a guy's driving on the road, and then he sees a chicken going past him on the road -- the chicken runs past his car. Delaney: The chicken outruns his car and goes to a farm with a bunch of chickens. Delaney: When he gets to the farm, he sees all these chickens zipping around really fast, like the chicken he saw earlier. Delaney: He asks the farmer "why are these chickens so fast", and the farmer says, "well, we like drumsticks." Delaney: "I like drumsticks, my wife likes drumsticks, and my son likes drumsticks." Delaney: "So I bred a chicken with three legs, so we don't have to fight over who gets drumsticks." Delaney: The guy says, "cool! But what do they taste like?" Delaney: The farmer says, "I don't know. I've never caught one." //Some of the class erupts in moderate applause Delaney: Thank you; thank you. I got more farm jokes. Some of them are even appropriate.
Delaney: If I went to the gym, and I worked out, and I had a baby, I would have a swole baby.
// Andy is doing his bio hw Schwartz: AAACGCATGCCGACCCCCTGT- // Later Schwartz: A couple of years ago, I proctored Duval's exam. Schwartz: I took a scantron and a copy of the test and I just did it, and turned it in. Schwartz: I got a 71%. *Applause from everyone around him*
// AP bio prep Jackie: Sickle cell disease. Jerry Song: SCD! Andy: STD? Jerry Song: No, SCD! That's cause you have an STD! // Later Jerry Song: Your mom is an alpha male! Andy: That's going straight into Blairbash! Jerry Song: Your mom is in Blairbash! Oh wait it won't fit! // Later Jackie: I know what fruit is! I'm so smart!
Delaney: Men are weird and square, and have sharp angles. Women are nice and round.