//Excerpted and paraphrased due to memory lapses
//Mr. Hammond walks into Quantum
Schafer: I bet Mr. Hammond is coming in to force whomever hasn't signed up yet for PuzzlePalooza to sign up.
Hammond: I am actually not going to do that.
Schafer: Oh, well then, I'm sorry.
Hammond: My feelings are hurt, Mr. Schafer.
(continuing with class) Schafer: The atom is from the Greek "atomos"...
Hammond: You got that from Donaldson.
Schafer: No, I actually didn't.
Hammond: Anything Greek is from Donaldson.
Melinchok: I'm Greek!
Hammond: Did you sign up for PuzzlePalooza yet?
Melinchok: No, I didn't. I need to send the link to my friend.
Hammond: You should just sign up without her.
Melinchok: Ok, I'm signing up now. (fills in form on her phone) I'll put down my talents as "Greek" and (something else).
Student: Isn't there a choice for "Other?"
Hammond: There is. Mr. Schafer, did I tell you about the best Other I've seen so far?
Schafer: No, what was it?
Hammond: It was "the ability to lie and say that Justin Bieber is cool."
Hammond: Hey, it isn't my fault that Mr. Ostrander has a man crush on Justin Bieber!
Hammond: The first rule of Puzzle Lords is that there are no Puzzle Lords.
Schafer: That is just wrong in so many ways.
Hammond: (to Melinchok) do you follow the Puzzle Lords on Twitter?
Melinchok: I unfollowed them because they kept on making annoying posts.
Schafer: Did you just say you UNfollowed them? Is that even like a thing? That's like saying you unfriended someone, it just doesn't make sense.
Hammond: And all of the annoying posts are by Mr. Stein!
Melinchok: Oh, I unfollowed him too.
Melinchok: Ok..I'll follow the Puzzle Lords, but...
Schafer: You'd better be really careful with what you say next.
Melinchok: But whenever I see an annoying post, I'll...scroll right past it and pretend that I never saw it!
Hammond: ...Someone must be submitting this to Blairbash right now.
Melinchok: What does it mean, the prizes are huge? Like are they literally huge, or what?
Schafer: Well, there are many ways a prize could be huge. Like it could be really big, and you say, "Wow, that's huge." Or it could be about this big (holds his hands about 8 inches apart) but you look at it and you go, "Wow, that's a huge prize." Or its name could be huge, like Huge the Hamster. We haven't done that one yet though.