Search Quotes 



Nov. 14, 2018, 4:26 p.m.

⚐ Report
Simon C: Your momma so fat she has more surface area than Gabriel's Horn!



Feb. 4, 2018, 12:18 p.m.

⚐ Report
Jessica: Oh! I have a class with Jesus! Daphne: ... who? Jessica *pointing at Simon*: Isn't his name Jesus? Debkanya: What? No, that's Simon! Jessica: Last year you said his name was Jesus. Debkanya: No... Jesus is another kid. Jessica: Oh. Later Jessica *sees Simon in hallway*: HI JESUS!



May 22, 2017, 11:32 a.m.

⚐ Report
Piper: Go put down the screen, guys. Haddad: I got it! Simon: No I want to do it! Haddad: Okay, Simon, you can press the button. //Simon presses the red button next to the button that puts down the screen, and then presses the button that puts down the screen Seoyoung: Uh, Ms. Piper, what does the red button do? //Liam runs in Liam: Ms. Piper, all the computers suddenly shut down!



Jan. 4, 2017, 10:39 p.m.

⚐ Report
//Precalc C, Rose begins a complex proof about the definition of an ellipse Rose: This proof is the type of Magnet treatment that you won't get at Whitman. Class: Simon!!! Rose: Huh?



May 3, 2016, 11:37 a.m.

⚐ Report
////Nick had just given Simon 5 bucks to buy lunch. Simon goes to lunch line and comes back Simon: So it turns out my parents put 500 dollars into my account.



April 6, 2016, 5:35 p.m.

⚐ Report
//After Simon hands in unit test Giles: Simon, you do know that rounding to the nearest thousandth doesn't mean a thousand digts, right? Simon: Oh.



March 23, 2016, 8:36 p.m.

⚐ Report
Rohit: So Simon, are you going to browse reddit all spring break? Simon: Of course I am! Rohit: But Why? //Mr.Street walks by Mr. Street: Why wouldn't you browse reddit all spring break?



Jan. 2, 2016, 3:51 p.m.

⚐ Report
//After a mostly block C physics of music presentation that consisted of about 20 people Simon: Block C 2019 is now a derogatory term.