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Feb. 1, 2024, 7:40 p.m.

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// Doing a simple proof in complex Schwartz: *opens Baby Rudin, hands book to River* Schwartz: Read the proof. River: The proof is trivial.



May 2, 2023, 12:16 p.m.

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Foster: If I can't say anything nice, then I won't write a rec for you. Josiah: Can you say anything nice about this guy? *points to River Qiu* Foster(after a long pause): ..yes.



April 17, 2023, 1:26 p.m.

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River Qiu: Your mother was there when they signed the fucking Constitution.



March 13, 2023, 8:36 a.m.

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// Schwartz is about to throw a paper ball at River Chen, who is sleeping Schwartz: Wait, he’s moving his fingers. Schwartz: Try not to sleep in class, but if you are going to sleep in class, don’t take up someone else’s desk.



Feb. 24, 2023, 2:13 p.m.

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River Qiu: How is Saving Private Ryan better than Spider-Man? Andy: Nobody actually died in Spider-Man. Saving Private Ryan used real footage from the D-Day landings. River: So you're saying that to make real entertainment we should actually kill people?



Jan. 18, 2023, 5:27 p.m.

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//after Schwartz tells about incidents relating to leaving campus at lunch River: So they notice that students go shoplifting when they leave campus during lunch, but what's stopping me from shoplifting out of school hours? Schwartz: You might want to rephrase that and talk about "a student" shoplifting ...



Dec. 16, 2022, 12:21 p.m.

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//Talking about trump selling nfts River: He actually looks so hot in all of them



Nov. 22, 2022, 11:03 a.m.

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//sean, dhe, and river q. in modsim Sean: When did Asian parents start naming their kids River? Dhe (pointing to River Q.): 16 years ago. Sean: That can't be true, because River Chen exists! Dhe: Ok, 17 years ago.

River Q. is a junior, and River C. is a senior.

sean, dhe, river



Nov. 18, 2022, 4:27 p.m.

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//River Chen walks back into Multivar after a mid-class departure, pulls out a bag of chips Schwartz: Did you just go in and buy a bag of chips? River: No, I had it in my sweatshirt the whole time.



May 19, 2022, 12:43 p.m.

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River: Self loathing is the national sport of Montgomery Blair High School