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#4462

1012

March 1, 2013, 5:51 p.m.

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//Klein's class doesn't want to write a rhetorical analysis. Klein sees a disorganized pile of books. Klein: Well you kinda have to... OH MY GOD! //Klein flips a table and runs to rearrange the pile of books. Klein: Class can't continue until I finish this! //Class begins applauding.

#4430

410

Feb. 11, 2013, 5:28 p.m.

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Eric Neyman: What's the difference between a paradox and an oxymoron? Klein: An oxymoron is a distilled paradox. Like jumbo shrimp... Or military intelligence.

#4411

1111

Jan. 30, 2013, 1:11 a.m.

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Klein: So this guy was obviously pretty smart. He knew to hide money in his butt so he could bribe people. Although I'm not sure I would want to be bribed with butt money...

During 9th period English 10, reading a story about someone who did just what Klein described.

klein

#4375

2731

Jan. 4, 2013, 6:53 p.m.

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Klein: If you make a threat, you have to be willing to carry it out. Student: What if you carry it out without making it? Mike: Then you're Pham.

#4346

11

Dec. 12, 2012, 7:36 a.m.

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Klein: I don't want you people, especially you boys, to worry how long it is. Class: ... Klein: Not like that you freaks!

Sure you weren't... He was talking about an essay due next class.

klein

#4340

1313

Dec. 9, 2012, 7:52 p.m.

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(Speaking in an anecdote) Mr. Klein: So when my wife was planning her wedding- Liam (Interrupting): Wait a minute, planning HER wedding? Not OUR wedding? //Pause Klein: Oh. Well, I showed up and did what they asked me to do!

#4303

1010

Nov. 14, 2012, 4:37 p.m.

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// Analyzing portrayals of Helen in English Klein: So I am going to ask for a higher level of maturity... And for the boys to keep their hands above the desk.

#4276

1212

Oct. 25, 2012, 12:19 p.m.

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Klein: So what do you think caused the banging? //Class remains silent Klein: Wow, that sounded awkward.

#4271

2325

Oct. 22, 2012, 9:35 p.m.

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Klein: So a couple students were asking me about the origin of the term pep rally, and after some research I figured it out. See, it comes from the word pepper, and peppers contain capsaicin, which really hurts when you put it in your eye. So it came from the idea that pep rallies are about as enjoyable as putting capsaicin in your eye.

#4130

77

May 7, 2012, 9:33 p.m.

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Klein: If it's not about the vomit, I'm not interested.