Grossman: Guys, don't do ketamine until you're over 70 years old.
Grossman: I’d go for Karl Marx. Karl Marx is hot . . . Look at that beard.
//various people talk about CAP Duval: I have some people in CAP in my classes. Katz: That's cap!
//Mr. Ostrander lecturing the 8th graders applying for CAP Ostrander: You all are lucky and unlucky. You're lucky that you get to leave earlier than the other kids. You're unlucky that you don't get to take the math portion of the test.
Rose: So let's say that we have a domain with five people, girls, and a codomain of three people, guys. So this is all on an island... Laura: This is obviously not functions class. Rose: Ok, let's say that it's CAP.
//9th period CAP Photo. Bustillos is explaining the 2nd quarter Independent Blog Post. Bustillos: The purpose of this Indie Blog Post is to get you guys to start dreamin'. Student 1: Why? We already dream enough -- in our sleep. Bustillos: Not that kind of dreaming. Dreaming as in what you wanna do with your life. Student 2: Why now? We're only in 9th grade! Bustillos: Y'see, when I was in 9th grade, all I did once I got home was sleep. //Class snickers. Bustillos: And that was the only thing I wanted to do -- sleep. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. Student 2: Is that why you're here...? Bustillos: Yeah. I don't want you guys to be like me. That's why y'all have to start dreamin'.
//Beginning of 9th period CAP Photo. The class is settling down. Bustillos is getting ready to start class. He holds a glass food container and chews as he speaks. Bustillos: There is absolutely no eating in this class. //Class snickers. Bustillos: See this? [Shows class the bowl.] This is my lunch. I didn't eat during 5th period so I'm eating it now. Girl Student: What is it? Bustillos: [Says name of the dish.] Girl Student: Ooh...can we see it? Bustillos: Sure! //He walks down the middle aisle showing off his food. Boy Student: That looks good. Bustillos: It used to be. Y'see, I've been eating this same thing for the last 20 years. Every single day for lunch. //Class doesn't believe him. Bustillos: No, I'm serious. Every Sunday for the last 20 years, I make myself a big tureen of this that lasts me through the week for lunch. [Looks in disgust at his bowl.] I'm just so sick of this. It doesn't even taste like anything anymore. Girl Student: Then why don't you cook something different? What about [name of some kind of chicken dish]? Bustillos: Y'know, that's a good idea, [name of chicken dish]! But the thing is, I barely know how to cook anything. So I'm stuck with this.
//Grossman hasn't shown up for a CAP 9 US History class for 20 minutes and everyone is just goofing off when Simel pokes her head in from next door Simel: Uh...where's Grossman? //The class goes quiet Simel: Okay, then, I was just gonna return [Random Student's] agenda book that they left in my room... //Simel returns the book and then cautiously backs out the door while everyone suppresses chuckles
//CAP Scriptwriting with Bustillos; he's mad (rightfully so) at a bunch of kids goofing off on their phones Bustillos: What is this, a program for idiots?! Student: Well, yeah, if we were smart, we'd be magnet!
//Goofing off in Ms. Jeral's class as usual. Samantha: Oh look, a coat hanger! Is that for illicit fish abortions?