#4078

77

April 12, 2012, 1:40 p.m.

⚐ Report

//Talking about trombones Roberts: 5th position is the worst position ever made Patrick Shan: That's what s- Roberts: For trombones.

#3803

311

Nov. 28, 2011, 9:40 a.m.

⚐ Report

Roberts: So I call those attractive notes "magnetic tones"  because they're attractive! //Julian bursts out laughing Roberts: I just, you know, I WANT those notes. Emma (aside): She's horny for those notes.

#3748

1515

Nov. 5, 2011, 12:27 p.m.

⚐ Report

//Roberts was explaining the solo transcription project in jazz band; Templin was a substitute for Mr. Clark and he was jamming on trombone with honors jazz Allison: I have a relevant question. Roberts: What is it? Allison: Can I just play the Born to Run solo by Bruce Springsteen? Roberts: No. That's not jazz. It's rock. Allison: Well, the blues are like a brother to jazz, and you know that blues had a baby and they called it rock and roll... so I think that it should count. Templin: Yeah, well it was an illegitimate child.

#3659

46

Oct. 11, 2011, 9:50 a.m.

⚐ Report

Roberts: Saxophones, you are the sirens that let everybody know that this chart is too hot to handle!

#3607

-13

Sept. 26, 2011, 4:51 p.m.

⚐ Report

//Trying to get people to leave the band room Ms. Roberts: You know like in that song? "Bye, bye, bye." (Waves her hands) 'Nsync. Alex Rittman: But I want it that way. Ms. Roberts: Ha! That's Backstreet Boys. Alex Rittman: They're from the same time... Ms. Roberts: NO. THE BACKSTREET BOYS ARE NOT 'NSYNC. GET IT STRAIGHT.

#3591

68

Sept. 21, 2011, 5:38 p.m.

⚐ Report

//Lecturing the percussion in Symphonic Band about tuning the tympani Mrs. Roberts: Why don't all of you carry a pitchfork with you? You should be like those tympanists with their bags with all their pitchforks. //The whole class looks confused Mrs. Roberts: Wait... did I just say pitchfork?

#3562

88

Sept. 16, 2011, 10:02 a.m.

⚐ Report

//Instructing the saxophones in Jazz Ms. Roberts: Saxophones, look at measure 86. So the other day, a hummingbird flew by my house. They're so cool! They flap their wings so fast you can't see them! So, same concept.

#3484

5052

Aug. 31, 2011, 4:05 p.m.

⚐ Report

//Talking about a practice marching band parade Ms. Roberts: You guys are all bunching up. You look like the accordion band. You don't want to look like that. Accordions are nerdy. Adam (Junior Drum Major): Um...excuse me, Ms. Roberts. I play accordion. Roberts: Oh... I'm sorry. Adam: Thank you. Roberts: No. I'm sorry you play accordion.

#3380

26

May 18, 2011, 7:39 p.m.

⚐ Report

//right after jazz band, where Allison has been complaining about how ugly her hat is Allison: Ms. Roberts, you know what's the ugliest thing in the world? Roberts: Your FACE? Students: -shocked laughter- Roberts: Did I just say that? Wow. It's only funny 'cause *I* said it.

#3323

99

May 6, 2011, 10:08 p.m.

⚐ Report

//The tubas were having difficulty hitting a note, so Ms. Roberts (MRob) gave them some advice. Ms. Roberts: You just have to push! Push, like... like you're giving birth through your instrument! Class: O.O -awkward laughter- Ms. Roberts: ...Okay, maybe that wasn't the best analogy...