#3084

2525

March 15, 2011, 12:17 p.m.

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// Trying to fix a mouse cable that had been slit open (exposing wires and shorting things). David K: Do you think maybe someone slit through this with a Stanley? Scott L: ... David: Actually, it looks more like someone sanded off half of the casing. Scott: Maybe one of the freshmen was teething.

#3047

1515

March 7, 2011, 10:17 p.m.

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//about how Chris can be somewhat intelligent, contrary to popular belief, especially when building trebuchets Sankar: So Chris is good at building, and he's pretty smart overall. //following the compliment, Chris smiles, then walks straight into a recycle bin Sankar: ...most of the time.

#3043

2222

March 7, 2011, 6:28 p.m.

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//R&E freshmen Student 1: You know if you use a clamp, hammering that would be a lot easier. Student 2: [frustrated] CLAMPS ARE FOR PUSSIES!

#2972

11

Feb. 23, 2011, 6:18 p.m.

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PA System: All ninth graders should... Whitacre: Who cares about ninth grade! PA System: ...auditorium for the ninth grade assembly. Whitacre: Just send 'em home. They're not here for any reason.

#2951

55

Feb. 18, 2011, 4:27 p.m.

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//Pham has prepared some hydrogen balloons and a lit candle. Student: I think there's a fire hazard here. Pham: There ALWAYS a fire hazard!

#2928

46

Feb. 13, 2011, 6:25 p.m.

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//during freshmen hell week, in magnet study hall Senior: Are there any freshmen in this class? Other senior: Yeah, over there. (points to freshmen table) Senior: Why isn't anyone beating them up? //resumes working

#2894

1515

Feb. 9, 2011, 2:58 p.m.

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//on the beltway Student 1 (looking out window): Look, that kid's screaming! Student 2 (without looking up): He probably didn't make the AMC 10. //kid is about 18 months old

#2875

1010

Feb. 5, 2011, 6:57 p.m.

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//to freshman Upperclassman: [quoting another teacher] So I could just flunk all of you... Rose: Hey, don't curse in front if freshmen. Upperclassmen: I said "flunk". Rose: Oh. Upperclassmen: [again quoting the teacher] ...but then you would all have to call me Rose.

#2868

55

Feb. 2, 2011, 9:24 p.m.

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//student asks why human lungs intake oxygen and let out carbon dioxide when Shirley walks in Pham: ...do you understand why you pull bag over head you die now? Shirley: (bewildered) ...??

#2827

2325

Jan. 20, 2011, 9:07 p.m.

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Vlasits: Yes, in the country families had lots of children. I guess they didn't have much else to do at night... //the class doesn't get it Vlasits: I'll let that one sink in for a while... //continues teaching