//Discussing a senior party: Teacher to Polina: You can also bring some Russian dessert. Nilay: Here's some... snow!
Tommy: soup Nilay: yo wassabi Tommy: what chew doing Nilay: why the stew-pid food puns Tommy: i donut, but im hungry for more Nilay: wow, another food pun, and i'll make you eat your words Tommy: wow simmer down now, no need to get all heated up over this Nilay: man, get ready - imma bout to fry you Tommy: umad cuz your temperature is boiling Nilay: wow, that was just terrible... i don't think you can ketchup to my punz Tommy: i dont think you can mustard up many more of these Nilay: i don't need to, cuz you're probably about to go pasta la vista Tommy: listen to this nutella pun, smh Nilay: bag-uette, son Tommy: o hush puppy. i got a dozen more where these came from Nilay: baker's dozen*, BURNNNN Tommy: wine about it to the baker then Nilay: beer you than me Tommy: your puns arent very palatable ... Tommy: time to bring out my weapons of mass convection Nilay: wow get the SMELL out Tommy: you knead to do a better job first Nilay: butter* Tommy: o lordy howd i miss that one. Nilay: cuz you doughn't see anything buddy Tommy: lemme give you a pizza my mind Nilay: dog (kekeke, koreans), imma bout to pop a corn up yo dunkin' donkey Tommy: this dog trying to talk like a man, duh. kekeke Nilay: kukukuku ... Nilay: kk juice? Nilay: truce** Tommy: fien. had more tho Nilay: lol really? Tommy: had a good thyme... Tommy: the skillet takes to make a good pun is beyond compare ... Nilay: kk we should pick an arbitrary subject and have punoffs Tommy: aight lol. on days ending in y ... Tommy: khoa gonna have some serious compuntition soon Nilay: haha you got that khompletely khorrect
Pham: Where Tommy? Nilay: ...he's not in this class. Pham: Oh.
Ms. Duval: Nilay, look at you, you're on fire!
// During the tree ID section of envirothon Nilay: Okay, so what's the name of this tree? Hmm... Carlos: Betsy. Or maybe it was Tom. // Nilay facepalms // Later Some freshman, shouting to his team: LET'S PUT THIS ONE TO BE A LOLBOBBY PINE! // Carlos and Nilay facepalm
// Poolesville kids are climbing a tree and get in trouble // Later, Nilay climbs up the side of the Envirothon main building but then jumps down Mr. Pham, walks out the building, casually to Nilay: You know, if I find out that the Blair kid climbing da tree, I breaks their neck! Nilay, quickly: Oh no - those were all Poolesville kids! Mr. Pham, smiles: Good.
Nilay, to Gibi: You look like a dinosaur. Gibi, to Gross: They're verbally harassing me! Gross: You're harassing them by how you look.
// Talking about the Great Schism Ravilious: ...but the French wanted a French pope. So, as they say, there was a great disruption in the Force. Nilay (aside): Yeah... wait what?
Schafer: My wife's friend's something something something does work on bridges, and he takes a lot of pictures. SO I get one that is actually useful every once in a while, like this one! (points to picture on Promethean board) Nilay: Also, that picture was in the textbook. Schafer: Oh. (pause) Well, a different picture.
// During a math test someone mixed up reciprocal and inverse functions Mr. Rose: ARE YOU SERIOUS?? Say "I'm a doofus!" Nilay: Can I quote you on that, Mr. Rose?