Carlos: So why don't you like the beach? Bracklinn: *deep breath* Bracklinn: I don't like sand. *laughter* Bracklinn: Seriously, though. It gets everywhere.
//As a manner of introduction, Mr. Gonzalez and other students around the room are stating why they should not be voted off the island //This is like the part in the reality show "Survivor" in which people state why they should not be voted off the island Carlos: You shouldn't vote me out because I'm the only Latino on this island. Gonzales: *looks incredulously at Carlos* //class laughs
//Carlos Max and Noam are half asleep at 3 am, talking about girls Noam: So Carlos, why are your tastes so weird? Carlos: Have you ever seen Ratatouille? Max: What does that have to do with anything? Carlos: So like, the rat cooks something disgusting for a critic, and the critic starts crying cause it reminded him of his family. I'm like the food critic, only weird. Noam: Wait, what?
*After Gym test, where Noam got 2 points off and Carlos got a perfect *For context, Carlos got a D on his first precalc test Carlos: Oh yeah! 24/24, suck on that! Noam: Just like I sucked on your D in precalc. Carlos: Um... Noam... Noam: Not in that way! Not in that way!
//During software design, testing a game Carlos: Okay, I think I got it working! Stephen: Alright, let's see it. Peter: Here, let me try! //He tests most functions Stephen: It works now! Yay! //as if on cue, Peter's character falls through the floor
// During the tree ID section of envirothon Nilay: Okay, so what's the name of this tree? Hmm... Carlos: Betsy. Or maybe it was Tom. // Nilay facepalms // Later Some freshman, shouting to his team: LET'S PUT THIS ONE TO BE A LOLBOBBY PINE! // Carlos and Nilay facepalm
//Ozzie starts laughing Stein: What's so [...] funny, Mr. Fffffallick? Ozzie: I asked Carlos for a comb, and he pulled out four. Stein: Carlos, show me your combs. //Carlos pulls out four combs, two from each pocket Stein: Are they specialty combs? Carlos: *glances down at them* One's broken. Stein: Why do you have four? Carlos: I thought I had two, but they copied-and-pasted.
//Carlos arrives at sports stat half an hour late Stein: Carlos, meet Eric. Eric, meet Carlos. Carlos: Hey Eric, I hear we're partners for some project.
Carlos: Is someone pregnant? Stein: Yes, people around the world are pregnant.
"Why can't the universe just work better?" - Carlos