Gilad: You know what would be cool? Mr. Schafer: Ice cream? Gilad: No. Schafer: NCAA Basketball on the big screen? Gilad: Yeah. Schafer: I have three issues with that: One, I don't think you can be quiet. Two, did I mention I don't think you can be quiet?
//Mr. Schafer is being filmed for consideration for the MCPS Teacher of the Year award Gilad: They should have competitive teaching. This would be, like, the ESPN coverage.
//There is preemptive decorating in case Schafer wins for best teacher Schafer: So I can just look to the back and see a huge "Congratulations". If I look left, I see another sign. Student: What about the sash? Schafer: Right, so I have this sash now! (puts it on) I was gonna have a tiara, but I never got it! Gilad: You should wear the sash to the awards ceremony! Schafer: Yeah, I'll wear a sash and a tiara to the awards. Act all prom queenish and stuff.
//Schafer is describing what he thinks the award ceremony for best teacher would be like Schafer: So it's like 3 hours or something. What are they gonna do with all that time? They could be like "Best securitry guard" or "Most hardworking building services worker" or something like that. And then imagine 3 hours of that junk! Student: Will you give an acceptance speech? Schafer: Yeah, and I'll just throw in some of your guys names. I might even make up some names. Gilad: Thank Dr. Quantum! Schafer: You know what, I'm gonna thank JK Rowling for inspiring a generation to read! Bae: And thank Stephenie Meyer for inspiring a generation NOT to read!
//Dzi's phone rings, and Schafer hums along 'til he picks it up Dzi: Hello? No...no... Grace: This happened during origins, too! Dzi: Look, you have the wrong number! (hangs up) Schafer: I can just imagine that. (holds hand to ear like a phone) "Hello? Hang on, I don't have a good enough signal (stands on chair). Yeah...uh-huh...hang on, (motioning to class) guys, can you quiet down? No...look, this is a wrong number, and you already bothered me during Donaldson's class. Yeah...you too." (takes hand down) //Class laughs //Just then, Dzi's phone goes off again...and he doesn't even look at it Gilad (holding up his phone): Hey Dzi, pick up your phone! //Schafer confiscates Gilad's phone... but not Dzi's
*Schafer is putting scales on a set of 3-D axes* Schafer: One, two, three, cuatro. That's Spanish for four. *switches axes* One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine. Gilad: That's English for nine. Schafer: *switches axes* One, two, three, four, five, six. Gilad: That's six for French.
//Eric Wan and Gilad are having some weird conversation Gilad: It's 72 virgins! Diana: Uh, what about 72 virgins? Gilad: It's the number of virgins Bin Laden promised me. *pause* I mean terrorists! //group comes to consensus that Gilad is a terrorist Diana: So is that why our quantum project isn't getting done? Gilad: *nod* I may have to kill you now.
Swaney: Now I'm afraid to say anything in this class because of BlairBash. //Swaney hits Jacob with a piece of paper as he walks by Gilad: You know that's going on BlairBash.
//Gilad says something mean to Swaney Swaney: Oh, so now that I've written your recommendations, you can pull out the rude? Gilad: You've written them already? Swaney: No... I haven't...
Everyone, close your eyes so that I can give Gilad the finger ~Mr. Rose