#1857

1111

May 2, 2010, 6:31 p.m.

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//Mr. Schafer is being filmed for consideration for the MCPS Teacher of the Year award Gilad: They should have competitive teaching. This would be, like, the ESPN coverage.

#1815

2020

April 22, 2010, 8:50 p.m.

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//Schafer lights a bunsen burner with a blowtorch Schafer: Never simply kill that which you can overkill

#1716

33

March 24, 2010, 3:33 p.m.

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Schafer: Rachel, pick a number between 0-2 that's an integer. Rachel: 3?

#1699

-37

March 21, 2010, 6:59 p.m.

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//Condensed version of a very, very long story (half hour roughly) Sarah: Hey, Mr. Schafer, can you have ice cream that doesn't melt? Schafer: I'm not sure... Sarah: But does it exist? Vishnu: I got this Mr. Schafer, I got this! It can't exist, it melts at room temperature! Student 1: The winner should get ice cream! Schafer: Or cookies! Sarah: But I'd rather have Indian food! Vishnu: My mom makes that, there's always leftovers! Schafer: So if Sarah's right, you bring in leftovers, and if you're right, she brings in cookies. But how will we know who wins? Student: We should vote! Schafer: So, you guys give your evidence, and we'll be the jury. You guys total 30 votes, you two don't get to vote, and I count as 32 votes. Student: That's not fair! Schafer: Life's not fair. Student: This is the strangest bet ever. Schafer: BUSINESS PROPOSITION! //Later on... Bae: I looked this up on my iPhone, and I found this article about it. Schafer: Great, he looked it up, now he's got all the power! Bae: So apparently there's this pudding-ice cream-thing that melts into pudding and therefore isn't solid. There's a picture, too! (shows) Vishnu: But pudding isn't ice cream! Sarah: But it should still count, it starts as ice cream! Vishnu: But it still changes! I win this! Schafer: Yeah, he wins. You owe him cookies.

#1675

88

March 17, 2010, 12:55 p.m.

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//There is preemptive decorating in case Schafer wins for best teacher Schafer: So I can just look to the back and see a huge "Congratulations". If I look left, I see another sign. Student: What about the sash? Schafer: Right, so I have this sash now! (puts it on) I was gonna have a tiara, but I never got it! Gilad: You should wear the sash to the awards ceremony! Schafer: Yeah, I'll wear a sash and a tiara to the awards. Act all prom queenish and stuff.

#1654

2628

March 15, 2010, 12:18 p.m.

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Schafer: You know what's indispensable? Especially in physical sciences, like math, physics, chemistry, engineering, its -- Contreras: Mr Pham. By far.

#1651

1717

March 13, 2010, 6:10 p.m.

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//Schafer is describing what he thinks the award ceremony for best teacher would be like Schafer: So it's like 3 hours or something. What are they gonna do with all that time? They could be like "Best securitry guard" or "Most hardworking building services worker" or something like that. And then imagine 3 hours of that junk! Student: Will you give an acceptance speech? Schafer: Yeah, and I'll just throw in some of your guys names. I might even make up some names. Gilad: Thank Dr. Quantum! Schafer: You know what, I'm gonna thank JK Rowling for inspiring a generation to read! Bae: And thank Stephenie Meyer for inspiring a generation NOT to read!

#1649

66

March 12, 2010, 5:03 p.m.

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//Dzi's phone rings, and Schafer hums along 'til he picks it up Dzi: Hello? No...no... Grace: This happened during origins, too! Dzi: Look, you have the wrong number! (hangs up) Schafer: I can just imagine that. (holds hand to ear like a phone) "Hello? Hang on, I don't have a good enough signal (stands on chair). Yeah...uh-huh...hang on, (motioning to class) guys, can you quiet down? No...look, this is a wrong number, and you already bothered me during Donaldson's class. Yeah...you too." (takes hand down) //Class laughs //Just then, Dzi's phone goes off again...and he doesn't even look at it Gilad (holding up his phone): Hey Dzi, pick up your phone! //Schafer confiscates Gilad's phone... but not Dzi's

#1586

2729

March 3, 2010, 4:28 p.m.

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Schafer: He's also the person who said there's no room for sarcasm in your classroom... I said I need a bigger classroom!

#1578

46

March 2, 2010, 4:41 p.m.

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//Talking about the "ladder of teaching" Schafer: So there's sort of this scale. At the bottom, it's like "organize the classroom". Then it's "learn the kids names". And its just all this stuff, and at the top is "Be a good teacher". But isn't all that other junk just what a good teacher does?