#2363

35

Oct. 14, 2010, 8:25 p.m.

⚐ Report

Mythili (to Fernando): I wonder if prostitutes get discounts on abortions...

#2419

35

Oct. 26, 2010, 11:23 p.m.

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Ms. Roberts: Stop loafing! (MB)^2: ? Ms. Roberts: You know, loaf. -in an official voice- Loaf is an adjective, meaning to- (MB)^2: VERB! Ms. Roberts: ... Did I say adjective? ... uh yeah actually I was really good at English back in high school...

#2520

35

Nov. 11, 2010, 8:05 p.m.

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Abdul-Rahim: For auditions, you can talk to that social studies teacher. Um. Grey hair. What's his name? Student: Vlasits Abdul-Rahim: Mr. Glasses? Like these? Student: No. Mr. VLASITS Abdul-Rahim: Molasses? ? Student: Vlasits. Like the pickle. Abdul-Rahim: Oh. Vlasits. Okay.

#2537

35

Nov. 16, 2010, 4:42 a.m.

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//shattering the english department orthodoxy Stelzner: Everyone teaches that Shakespeare was this wonderful poetic soul who believed in his art. Truth is, he was a businessman. He was a really good businessman. He wrote his plays and he made a shitload of money.

#2585

35

Nov. 19, 2010, 10:43 p.m.

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Freeman: Visiting dignitaries include the U.S. Secretary of Education, the person in charge of the Department of Education. Or at least until the Tea Partiers abolish it or something.

#2601

35

Nov. 23, 2010, 9:55 p.m.

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Donaldson: ...and this is why people like Al Gore and I are concerned about carbon dioxide levels. Viju: You may not want to put yourself together with Al Gore.

#2733

35

Dec. 31, 2010, 6:38 p.m.

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Teacher: Julie Zhu. She's an amazing artist. She's one of those people that, if I were 22, I'd be in a lot of trouble.

#2754

35

Jan. 4, 2011, 10:04 p.m.

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Teacher (shouting): SHUT THE HELL UP! You see that? [Points at clock.] 2:25. I don't wanna hear one damn word out of your mouth until the little hand is on the three and the big hand is on the twelve. Understand? Jordan: Yes! Oops. Sorry, sorry, sorry! [Makes a series of humming noises while waving arms.] Teacher (to Jordan): Shut up and sit down. Teacher (to class): See? Now he understands.

#2777

35

Jan. 12, 2011, 7:35 p.m.

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//Fillman's 9th period English class, reviewing for final exams... Fillman: See, this is a great essay! It's just FILLED with snoozalicious words and sentences! Viju: No wonder I'm sleepy...

#2784

35

Jan. 14, 2011, 3:53 p.m.

⚐ Report

Duval: I think that's about an 85. Jason: Wait. Yes. No. I think it's an 89. Wait. No. Duval: Anyway, probably about a mid B Jason: NO! You're doing your calculator wrong!