Search Quotes
#2253
39
⚐ ReportRose: No, Mitchell, no more talking for you. Mitchell: I have a legit question. Rose: I don't care. *continues teaching/lecturing*
#2250
1012
⚐ ReportRose: What's the arc sine of negative one half? Student: Eleven pi over six. Rose: Oooo... who said that? What's the correct answer to the arc sine of negative one half? More Students: Eleven pi over six. Rose: Ugh! If you say eleven pi over six, I want to, like, kill myself. So wrong, unbelievable, it's totally unacceptable, and really really really really really bad, and wrong, totally wrong!!!
#2249
2525
⚐ ReportStein: I have a couple things to tell you about this Standard Normal Probability Table. The good news is, I am willing to copy, at the expense of Montgomery County Public Schools, one of these for you. It is [also] on the inside cover of your textbook, however it is a pain in the butt to flip back and forth when you're doing your homework. If you lose [the copy], it is easy to find it. Just google image search "Standard Normal Probability Table", and you too can print out one of these. It's not a secret. That's the good news. Stein: The bad news is I don't call it the "Standard Normal Probability Table", and what I'm about to tell you is probably the most annoying thing you'll hear from me the whole year, and you're going to hear it over and over again until you can't stand it, because I call this thing the "CH-A-R-A-R-A-RT" *shouts in crazy fluctuating/yodeling tone*, like that. // students laugh Stein: Now, there's no reason for that. I've been doing it for probably twelve years, since I started teaching statistics. You can't stop me. I know it's annoying and I continue to do it, so there's nothing you can do about it. And probably in about ten minutes you're going to be sick of hearing about the "CH-A-R-A-R-A-RT", but there's nothing you can do about it and just think how you're going to feel in January. After every time you got this piece of paper out, the stupid teacher goes "CH-A-R-A-R-A-RT" and nobody knows why. And what makes it even stupider is this is not even a chart. It's a table, so there's no reason behind why I call it the "CH-A-R-A-R-A-RT". Stein: Now first of all, there are two sides to it. Do you see the column that says "z"? One side has positive z and the other side has negative z. Now, you might think to yourself, being a smart person... Students: ...self... Stein: Thank you... it's symmetric, so you don't really need both sides, right? Students: Right. Stein: And in fact, I learned this when I was tutoring a kid who was doing IB. In Europe, they only give you one side. And you can do the problems just fine with only one side, but there's a reason why Europe is in decline and the United States is the greatest country on Earth. And one of the reasons why the United States is the greatest country on Earth and Europe is in decline is that we have both sides because we're Americans, and we don't need both sides but damn it, we get both sides!
#2248
44
⚐ Report// immediately after teaching the World-Famous Normal Curve Interpretive Dance Stein: That is The World-Famous... // Louis Wasserman spontaneously walks into the room (317) Stein: Do you remember? Wasserman: Oh, which is this? Stein: The World-Famous Normal Curve Interpretive Dance. Wasserman: Oh, heck yeah! Stein *to the class*: See, he graduated... Wasserman: ...three years ago. Stein: Three years ago, but it's still the highlight of his high school education. Wasserman: Absolutely!
#2247
13
⚐ Report// Ostrander spontaneously walks into 317 Ostrander: You have a projector and a Promethean Board. Stein: The TV? Ostrander: Yeah, you have like two projectors. Stein: It's a multimedia classroom. Ostrander: If we remove that one, would you be offended? *referring to the pre-Promethean era ceiling-mounted projector* Stein: That one? Yeah, I'll be offended! I need that... *referring to the Promethean projector* Ostrander: ...for... Stein: That's the Promethean... oh, THIS one! *points to the ceiling-mounted projector* // students laugh Stein: I thought you were talking about the Promethean Board and the television. Ostrander: No, no no. Stein: That was there before the Promethean Board. Ostrander: ... that device that no one uses. Stein: Yeah, that can go to 309. Ostrander: Uh... it'll probably go into an English room, but it will go somewhere without a Promethean Board. Stein: But what about 309? That needs it. Ostrander: I know. *students laugh* I don't have any teachers in 309.
#2246
88
⚐ ReportWhitacre: Yeah, sociopaths... you can tell they usually have no conscience about anything, no feelings. I know early on, ladies, that sounds just like guys in general, but, you know, give 'em a chance. If they want to put a puppy in a microwave, it's time to call the cops.
#2245
77
⚐ ReportWhitacre: You never heard of Jeffrey Dahmer? [He] was a major serial killer, not the cereal kind you eat. This is the guy who went out and would track people down and kill 'em and put their body parts in the freezer and then, you know, have breakfast every once and a while. [Have] a nice slice of, you know, bacon and eggs, and a little human on there, yeah.
#2244
57
⚐ ReportStudent: Infinitive! Student: Infinitive? Student: Infinitive! Student: Infinitive? Student: Infinitive! Student: Infinitive? Student: Infinitive! Student: Infinitive? Giles: This is the dumbest conversation I have ever heard! Both of you be quiet for the rest of class.
#2241
1414
⚐ ReportKaluta: I need to find this picture... so anyways, when I was a kid, I would peel paint off the wall and eat it. It was lead paint, which is bad bad bad! And that's why I'm not as smart as Mr. Templin. Templin: That's right. You're not as smart as Mr. Templin.