Blairbash.org

Search Quotes 

#13025

44

Feb. 9, 2024, 3:57 p.m.

⚐ Report
Schwartz: Now I have drawn an astronaut-dog-horse-Amogus-thing with a monocle. We'll add more. //Hammond walks in shortly afterward Hammond: Are you actually doing any maths here? Schwartz, pointing to writing on board about set theory: Yeah! This is maths. Sean: Maths? What are you talking about? This is AP Amogus! //later Schwartz: Which of these points are "exterior"? Hammond: It's very simple. Just ask which ones the amoeba should eat.

#12938

1010

Jan. 31, 2024, 1:18 p.m.

⚐ Report
*hammond raises hand in the corner* Schafer: Hammond? Hammond: If you use elephants in your problems can we assume they are spherical? Schafer: *deep breath, pause* Schafer: Yes.

#12172

1214

Sept. 20, 2023, 6:58 p.m.

⚐ Report
On talk like a pirate day Schwartz: If Captain Hammond comes in, ye have me' permission to ball up paper and throw it at him! > Later, Dylan is about to throw a paper ball at Will Schwartz, in a normal voice: No, don't throw it at Will, you only have my permission to throw it at teachers. > Dylan turns to throw the paper ball at Schwartz

#12155

1212

Sept. 19, 2023, 12:29 p.m.

⚐ Report
Hammond: what be a pirate’s favorite element? Alex Bidwell: Arrr-gon! Hammond: no! ‘tis an easy question! it be gold! Kirk (normal voice): idiot

#12154

44

Sept. 19, 2023, 12:25 p.m.

⚐ Report
Kirk: mr. Hammond, you haven’t drawn a pink elephant on the board in a while! Hammond (pirate voice): elephants do not be swimming in the briny deep! Hammond: they do be swimming though. Hammond: I have seen it on my travels!

#11761

35

April 18, 2023, 12:14 p.m.

⚐ Report
Hammond: Senioritis? I've never heard of it.

#11690

88

March 16, 2023, 6:51 p.m.

⚐ Report
//Hammond visited to tell us about Puzzlepalooza and its origin Hammond: You would show up to school on time, have nothing to do for two hours, and get hit by a car when you go to Starbucks. Hammond: Then we made Puzzlepalooza, and everyone loved it, and nobody died that year. Hammond, quietly: Nobody died in the previous years. That's a joke. I guess it's too early for jokes. //later Hammond, to Bosse: These are good questions they're asking. Is this your Ravenclaw class? //later, after Hammond left Bosse: No questions? You had so many questions for Mr ... what's-his-name. Sudhish: Why don't you know his name? Bosse: There's so many Peters running around here!

#11575

1010

Feb. 15, 2023, 2:10 p.m.

⚐ Report
// printer in 215 turns on Schafer: the weird thing is, that’s probably Mr. Hammond sending me a message.

#11405

99

Jan. 10, 2023, 5:26 p.m.

⚐ Report
Schwartz: The first example is finding the volume of a sphere with triple integration. Schwartz: It's fine, that works. Let's do the harder example. //Hammond bursts in Hammond: Lies! All lies! //later Hammond, holding up a type of laptop: The problem with these is you can't trust students not to steal them. Hammond: You know I'm joking, right? Don't go home and say "the teacher said that we're not trustworthy!" Schwartz: Well, of course they're not trustworthy. They're teenagers. Hammond: Ageist! Schwartz: Developmentalist! Some people are 30 and they're still "teenagers". //later, Hammond examining the whiteboard's ρ^2 sin φ dρ dθ dφ Hammond: There's too much Greek here. //later, Schwartz drawing and explaining a 3D shape Schwartz: This is an ice-cream cone. Hammond: No, that's the Eye of Sauron! //later Schwartz: Let's not blindfold our ice-cream cone.

#11212

35

Nov. 22, 2022, 7:55 a.m.

⚐ Report
// Hammond walks into AP World Klees: I knew Hammond was gonna come. Klees: I knew he was gonna track me down.