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#3249

77

April 16, 2011, 12:59 p.m.

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// After cleaning and relocking the staff bathrooms, which are full of random junk. Taylor: Well, that was an interesting bathroom experience. Student: Yeah, I really enjoyed it too. Student: ...of all the things I could say to a teacher, I never thought I'd say that.

#3270

77

April 28, 2011, 11:22 a.m.

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// during a Thermo test Schafer: Because we are in MC, our power is provided the wonderful...PEPCO! That means, in the event that the power goes out, which is very likely, you will be taking your test by candlelight! So don't think that you'll be off the hook for your test if the lights go out.

#3283

77

April 29, 2011, 11:48 p.m.

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Rose: If you ever get your bike stolen in Amsterdam, you can just go to the red light district and buy it back from some junkie for $5.

#3301

77

May 2, 2011, 7:41 p.m.

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//Devin cuts the top off of a soda can to make a bowl Jeremy: Wow the edges are pretty sharp. Its like a cookie cutter. Except it cuts humans.

#3302

77

May 2, 2011, 9:15 p.m.

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//Sally to class late from the Guys and Dolls teaser Roth: What are you? Sally: A stripper Roth: Now I'm going to see the show!

#3337

77

May 10, 2011, 9:07 a.m.

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//Discussing a senior party: Teacher to Polina: You can also bring some Russian dessert. Nilay: Here's some... snow!

#3373

77

May 17, 2011, 11:12 a.m.

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//Analysis 1B Tatyana, randomly: Mufasa, do you like your mom? Mufasa: Is this a trick question? Phillip: I do!

#3384

77

May 19, 2011, 11:32 a.m.

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Stein: I can already feel the post-Puzzlepalooza depression setting in...

#3401

77

May 21, 2011, 5:13 p.m.

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Hafner: The rapture is going to occur in three hours, if anyone wanted to know. Briese: Does that mean that in places three hours ahead of us, the rapture has already occurred? Hafner. Yes. And Europe is six hours ahead of us, so the rapture has already occurred there. //soon Hafner (to Schafer): The rapture has already occurred in Europe. Schafer: Good.

#3412

77

May 25, 2011, 10:38 a.m.

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Thomas: Christine O'Donnell isn't Asian. Richard: After I breed with her, she will be.