#898

1214

Nov. 19, 2009, 8:12 p.m.

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Qinlan (about Burger): He was right in front of me and I couldn't see him! Burger: Maybe it's because I'm already dead. Shelley: We should market his body to necrophiliacs.

#1608

1214

March 8, 2010, 8:42 a.m.

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//Pham walks into 318 and goes up to Duval Pham: Sign this! Duval: What is it? Pham: I don't know! It don't matter, just sign it! (class laughs) Brian G: I'll sign it! Pham: No you won't. Anyone here 18? Someone: Get Rose to sign it!

#1904

1214

May 10, 2010, 7:23 p.m.

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Mr. Pham: Homework should only be taking 20 minutes! *4 months later* Mr. Pham: Homework should only be taking 3 hours!

#2455

1214

Oct. 29, 2010, 11:46 p.m.

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//Alex C-G is about to make up a test he missed Pham: Did you talk to anybody about the test? Alex: (shakes head) I studied like a dog, yo. Pham: Dog don't study. Class: (laughter) Pham: What? Is not funny.

#3257

1214

April 25, 2011, 5:27 p.m.

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Rajan: Wolfram Alpha is never wrong. It's Jesus.

#3299

1214

May 2, 2011, 4:46 p.m.

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Grossman: We don't need to see New Zealand's reaction to Osama's death. Thomas: They're probably too busy having sex with sheep and being upside down anyways.

#3717

1214

Oct. 27, 2011, 10:11 p.m.

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//Student asks to go to the bathroom, Lodal says no Lodal: Today I am in one of those moods where I'm just going to say no to everything. Sankar: Can I NOT go to the bathroom? Lodal: No. //after some thought Lodal: See, now I know the game you're playing and I'm just not going to answer any questions at all. Sankar: But what if I already won?

#3801

1214

Nov. 21, 2011, 7:12 p.m.

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//It's the week before Thanksgiving. Whitacre: Because of the great American holiday coming up - the one where we celebrate the destruction of an entire culture and mass genocide, we're going to be watching a movie about one of the greatest Americans out there. Student: Captain America? Whitacre: Yep!

#3805

1214

Nov. 28, 2011, 12:47 p.m.

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Moose: Hold up your questions. If you don't have them, you have to take your punishment like a man. Or a woman. Evan: Can we choose?

#3865

1214

Dec. 22, 2011, 2:43 p.m.

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Patrick: Hey, Mr. Kaluta? Kaluta: No.