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#2943

3032

Feb. 17, 2011, 4:59 p.m.

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//Nadia was absent the day before, Valentine's Day Pham: Nadia, where you been yesterday? Nadia: I was sick. Pham: You not sick! You go on date!! (points to chocolate and card on Nadia's desk) What boy that from??

#3168

3032

March 29, 2011, 4:07 p.m.

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Richard: We should make a calculus rap! Thomas: It should be by TI.

#3493

3032

Aug. 31, 2011, 5:56 p.m.

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Bosse: One of my favorite things to do is to go online and read Pham quotes on Blairbash.

#3538

3032

Sept. 10, 2011, 4:47 p.m.

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//After a computer science quiz Piper: If anyone asks you how the quiz was, you say "great". And if they ask what was on it, say "computer science". Let's try it: How was the quiz? Class: Great. Piper: What was on it? Class: Computer science. Schafer: Now, pretend we just had a physics quiz. How was the quiz? Class: Great. Schafer: What was on it? Class: Computer science.

#3904

3032

Jan. 22, 2012, 7:38 p.m.

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//From the butyric acid incident a long time ago that made the entire 3rd floor smell, as Mr. Hammond put it, like "dead feet cheese" //Emmeline, Tatyana, and Audrey are boiling ethanol and butyric acid (smells like vomit) together to make ethyl butanoate (which smells like pineapple). Alcohol+acid=nice smelling ester Emmeline + Tatyana: Wow, that smelled disgusting before. At least the pineapple smells nice after the ethanol was added. Pham: Yeah, it like how ugly girl turn beautiful! Emmeline + Tatyana: By combining them...with alcohol?? //Later, the flask dropped to the floor and the unreacted butyric acid spread and made everything smell almost unbelievably terrible and the scent had absorbed into Emmeline's and Tatyana's clothing Tatyana: Mr. Pham! Are you laughing at my misery?! Pham: Don't you used to it by now? *laughs* //Later.. Tatyana + Emmeline: Mr. Pham! Why did you let us do the experiment with butyric acid in the first place, especially since your fume hood is all messy?! Pham: It because they no give me window room. I take revenge every year. //Emmeline's next class made her sit in the very back corner of the classroom with all the windows open. Smell tests were conducted on anyone entering the 3rd floor computer labs. Tatyana ran to her next class, accidentally touching the door of a different room... freshmen crowded around the door, asking "Did something die in there?!" Tatyana: (entering room): Does anyone have a change of clothing? //Student, extremely tall, athletic guy in basketball clothes raises hand Tatyana: Err...anyone else? Eva: Oh! You can have my shirt. But I NEED my pants. //In the end, things worked out fine, although Mr.Hammond and the nostrils of many students will likely fondly remember the day the third floor smelled like sweaty gym socks and moldy cheese.

#4799

3032

March 17, 2014, 9:14 p.m.

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//Hammond keeps commenting on how Schafer is teaching. Schafer: You're ruining this class! //Schafer returns to covering the photoelectric effect. Nino: Can I go to the bathroom? Schafer: _Can_ you go to the bathroom? I certainly hope so. Paul: May we get to that homework question? Schafer: Can I get through these notes first? Paul: I don't know; can you? //Class "ooh"s. Schafer: Well, actually, that's a fair question. Hammond: You know, I think you're doing a fine job of ruining this class yourself. You don't need me. Schafer: I have two words for you. Let's see if you can guess them. Hammond: "Thank you." Schafer: The two words are "salmon pickles," just so you know. Hammond: "Salmon pickles?" Schafer: Well, duh. What did you think they were? Hammond: I thought they were, "thank you." Schafer: Oh. I thought you were thanking me. Well, in any case, you're right about the second word. And the last letter of the first word. //Class "ooh"s.

#5931

3032

May 12, 2016, 6:53 p.m.

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//Eli bet Kristi she couldn't wear a pancake on her head all day //Dondee walks into precal carrying an origami deer head Student 1: Mr. Giles, why don't you even look surprised that someone just brought in a paper deer head? Giles: There is literally someone wearing a bread hat. I wouldn't be surprised if someone came in with a deer carcass. Student 2: It's a pancake, not bread. //Later, Katheryn puts a pancake on her head as well Giles: Now there are two people wearing pancakes. //Later, Schafer is explaining an analogy involving polar graphs, a mouse, a toy car, and a bucket of paint Giles: You all stare at him like he's crazy as you wear pancakes on your head. Schafer: Ooh I like pancakes!

#7365

3032

April 3, 2018, 9:18 a.m.

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//Schwartz yelling math across the hall. Bosse: I’m learning so much math now! How does he have so much energy? Reynald: He’s young.

#7460

3032

May 1, 2018, 10:23 p.m.

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Pham: You guy get headache when you leave my class. You know why? It because your brain getting bigger.

#7722

3032

Nov. 12, 2018, 1:10 p.m.

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Rose: So I haven't slept the past two days ... Rose: My hands are shaking so much I can't write on the board ... Rose: Kevin was the only person who actually did this proof all the way. Anson: So you're saying Kevin did the proof on the left to set up the equivalent proof on the right? Rose: Wait how did you know Kevin did this, did you talk with him after the test?