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Feb. 16, 2023, 7:09 p.m.

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//Schwartz holds up a large plastic hoop Schwartz: I have a stuff-detector. It detects stuff. When stuff goes thru it, it will detect the stuff. Class: Wow //Schwartz opens the window and holds up stuff-detector to it Schwartz: This is a stuff-provider. It brings in stuff, like wind. The stuff-detector will go "waah!" [wiggles hoop excitedly] Class: Wow //later Schwartz: I could fit the stuff-detector in the window, if only this bottle [on the water-dispenser] weren't here. Schwartz: It's almost empty -- does anyone need water? //various students take water excitedly //eventually one of them takes the last of it, Schwartz removes the bottle in amazement Schwartz, mounting hoop in bottle's place: Now I have a stuff-detector stand! //Entire class erupts in thunderous applause



Sept. 7, 2022, 10:07 a.m.

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//Pd. 4 Bio. Glenn is talking about a lab that will happen the next day. Dylan: "What if we are allergic to some of the chemicals used in the lab?" Glenn: "All we will use is water." Dylan: "I'm allergic to water."



May 31, 2022, 5:31 p.m.

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Schwartz: If we get to [textbook unit] 7.7, we get to submerge Mr Schafer in giant bodies of water! Class: Yay! Schwartz: And by "Mr Schafer", I mean imaginary Mr Schafer. Class: Ohhh ...



March 2, 2022, 5:25 p.m.

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Stephen: Let's say I had an Olympic swimming pool and dumped a bunch of salt into it.



Oct. 14, 2021, 7:42 a.m.

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David: *drinks from the school water fountain* David: it's a very acidic taste, it's actually very good David: like lemonade mixed with battery acid... and lead



Oct. 16, 2018, 8:44 a.m.

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//crystalline structure Lodal: Water is not solid. Water refers to ice, and the only place I would have to specify this is in a room full of magnets who are obsessed with calling each other out for being wrong.



May 20, 2014, 9:39 p.m.

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//Pham talking about clean water Pham: By the way, anyone here vegetarian? //Ramu raises his hand Pham: The water we drink filled with dead bug and stuff anyway. There no use be vegetarian.



Feb. 24, 2011, 5:49 p.m.

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//after being questioned about drinking three bottles of water at lunch Jeremy: Urination is a lot more fun than dehydration.



Feb. 7, 2011, 6:18 p.m.

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Pham: Is water safe? Class: Uh...yes. Pham: What? No! Class: ... Pham: Why water not safe? Michelle: I don't know... Pham: Easy! I take you to the middle of the ocean and drop you in!



Dec. 15, 2010, 8:10 a.m.

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// Billings, Patrice, and Viju are talking about how rain in India is formed instantaneously Patrice: Does sweat do the same thing there? Viju: Uhhh... no, the proteins and salt prevent it from condensing back Jason Ma: And that's why it tastes salty when you lick yourself! Everyone else: O_o