#5318

119131

Dec. 15, 2014, 4:47 p.m.

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//Unnamed student (henceforth "Student") is giving a practice SRP presentation on people’s ability to distinguish between speaking and singing. //Student finishes presenting; more than half of the class raises their hand. Mike, to Matthew: Sorry, what’s everybody’s question? Matthew: Like, "what exactly did you do, again?" //Questions went on for half an hour. Below are some highlights. -- Harrison: So basically your project is about differentiating between speaking and singing. Do you have an objective definition of singing? Student: Singing is pleasing to the ears. Harrison: But do you have an objective definition? Student: No. Music is subjective. Harrison: Okay, so basically your project is meaningless. //Student calls on someone else. -- Arjuna: Doesn’t perception change with age? Student: Yeah, but age doesn’t really matter. Arjuna: So are you blocking by age? Student: Um... uh... yeah, sure. -- Eric: How many age blocks do you have? Student: Age doesn’t really matter. Eric: But are you blocking by age? Student: Uh, sure. Eric: So you have a sample size of 24, you have two gender blocks, and you have several age blocks. How will you be able to get statistically significant results? //Class laughs. Student: Well, after we have the data, we’ll figure out whether it’s statistically significant. Matthew: But Eric just figured out that it’s not statistically significant. Mike, to Matthew and Eric: Okay, we’ve determined that the whole project is BS. Let’s move on. //Student calls on the next person with a question. -- Sachin: Can you go back to the first slide? //Student goes back to the title slide. //5-second silence Student: So what’s your question? Sachin: Oh, I don’t have one. I just wanted you to go back to that slide. //Later Eric: Wait, why did you ask to go back to the first slide? Sachin: I just wanted to stall. Eric: So there wouldn’t be any more presentations? Sachin: Yeah, and to troll. -- Eric, to Mike: I think his project is not topologically equivalent to Salamano. //Note: Salamano, a character in _The Stranger_, is Eric’s go-to example of something that doesn’t have holes in it. Mike, to Eric: I think his project is topologically equivalent to a sponge. //After 5 seconds. Mike, to Eric: Actually, it’s topologically equivalent to a Sierpinski sponge, because it has no volume. Dennis, to Mike and Eric: If he did a math presentation, he would understand numbers better than anyone since Morris Kline. //Note: making fun of this ridiculous quote at the bottom of the front cover of this book: http://www.amazon.com/Mathematics-Loss-Certainty-Oxford-Paperbacks/dp/0195030850/ref=cm_rdp_product_img -- Ms. Bosse: Did anybody not ask a question yet? -- //This one might not be very accurate. //Kevin frantically waves his hand. Student calls on him. Kevin: You said during your presentation that audio evidence cannot be used in court, but I think that you can in fact use audio recordings in court. Student: Oh, by audio evidence I mean what people say they heard, not actual recordings. Kevin: But what if there’s hearsay? Student: What’s hearsay? //Kevin explains what hearsay is. Student: Oh, but I’m talking about actual recordings.

#3414

99

May 25, 2011, 4:35 p.m.

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// KevLi is taking pictures of people in SRP with a camera Freddy: Psh. You guys and your technology. KevLi: This is coming from the guy that's going to be a computer scientist. Freddy: Hey, you don't need a computer to be a computer scientist you know. Watch, I'll be the world's first computer-less computer scientist.

#3407

1111

May 23, 2011, 6:29 p.m.

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// Kevli has a suit on for his fake SRP presentation Freddy: Oh man. I will take a picture of you and put it on my wall - my real wall, not like facebook or whatever you use - and write "My Role Model" above it. I will pray to it 5 times a day while facing Mecca! Kevli: ...

#2420

77

Oct. 27, 2010, 9:50 a.m.

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Kevin: Hum Bad Apple in Kathryn's ear. Philip: Hump that apple? Freddy: I wanna see that!!

#1710

1111

March 23, 2010, 8:02 p.m.

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//Joseph and Diana are setting up their SRP presentations. Rose walks in. Rose: Hey, who's going first? //Joseph and Stubby point at Diana Rose (to Joseph): I want to see your thing so bad. //Entire room starts laughing

#1612

1717

March 8, 2010, 6:49 p.m.

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// Ravilious was talking about how she had a sub last class Ravilious: I take it Mr. Green survived the experience? Alex Br: There was blood everywhere! Burger: He walked out with one less arm than he walked in with. Kevin: He had three to begin with.